firestarter drew

Firestarter (1984) is one of those Stephen King adaptations that was constantly playing on television, so saw it about 100x during my pre-teen years (I think my parents didn’t consider it a scary horror film because it’s not a slasher flick, so it escaped being part of the “not until you’re 13” rule they imposed).

And while the film does scare me, it’s not Charlie — so brilliantly played by a tiny Drew Barrymore — and her pyrokinetic powers that I’m afraid of. Nope! It’s the government that’s after Charlie and her father that I’m afraid of! Specifically “The Shop” that caused Charlie’s parents and her to have their powers, run by a steely Captain (Martin Sheen) who’s only interest is using Charlie as a weapon, and even more specifically, one-eyed John Rainbird (Geroge C. Scott), who becomes obsessed with Charlie and somehow thinks he can absorb her power.

After Andy McGee (David Keith) arrives home to find his pretty wife dead (Oh, Heather Locklear! You and your amazing hairdo barely get any screen time in this movie), he grabs his daughter Charlie and the two are off and on the run from government agents. Aided by Andy’s ability to “push” people to get the things they need, they run into some minor trouble when it becomes clear that Charlie has trouble controlling her pyro powers — especially when she’s mad. Of course, eventually the government agents catch up and capture them, and that’s when we meet John Rainbird. *shiver* (more…)


Evil Dead (2013)

Evil Dead 2013

{Cross-posted to Three Imaginary Girls}

Holy shit you guys. Holy. Shit. I was really hoping the Evil Dead reboot would be awesome, but I had no expectations that it would be as fantastically amazing as it turned out to be. As a horror fan, I gotta tell you that this is one of the finest examples of the genre that I’ve ever seen. Ever.

Fans of the original don’t need to be worried—it’s not a straight-up remake. It’s more of a reboot that uses the basics of The Evil Dead story as a starting point to create a new legend, combined with some really clever nods to Raimi’s work. Which include a new take on his signature camera moves and some great twists on everything you loved about the 1981 flick.

The opening sequence sets you up for the glorious splatter that follows in a surprisingly original way. And you probably know the rest, more or less: five friends head to a cabin in order to help their heroin-addicted friend Mia (Jane Levy, I will never be able to look at you on Suburgatory the same way again) dry out. The group includes Mia’s somewhat estranged brother, David (Shiloh Fernandez); his blonde girlfriend, Natalie; dark-haired nurse Olivia, and bespectacled hipster-nerd Eric. (more…)


31 Horror Movies I Own #20: Carrie (1976)

Almost everyone is probably familiar with the blood-soaked fiery Prom at the end of Carrie. But I’m hear to tell you, if you haven’t seen the whole film in its entirely, you’re missing out.

In a scene that reminds me exactly why I hated high school, the film opens on outcast Carrie White being tormented by her entire gym class when she discovers her period, with the mean girls throwing tampons and pads at her and taunting her with cries of “Plug it up”. Unfortunately for the girls, teacher-with-a-conscience Miss Collins sentences them all to detention in the form of strenuous gym class after-school, or they’ll all miss Prom. (more…)

Final Destination 3: Tanning Bed Boiling

#3: Most Ridiculous Horror Movies Deaths EVER: Twin Tanning Bed Boiling

Although I have a strange fondness for the way the Final Destination movies continue to plan a Rube Goldberg-esque series of events for each horrible death, I didn’t buy the laughable attempted “death by tanning bed” murder in I Still Know What You Did Last Summer, and I still didn’t buy it in Final Destination 3.

Would the tanning bed temp even be able to get that high? Would the lights get so hot they would crack the glass? And the shelf trapping both of them is a bit *too* convenient, non?

Yeah, yeah – I know. It’s Final Destination 3. What was I expecting?