You’re Next



{Cross-posted to Three Imaginary Girls

Contrary to its “EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS SCARY” trailerYou’re Next is packed with quite a bit of fun. Sure, there are elements of scariness, but the best thing about this splatter-fest is that it’s infused with a lot of clever moments.

For example, taking the basic “trapped in a remote location” horror movie premise, and then flipping it by ignoring not one, but two, of the usual genre tropes: a heroine who actually fights back (think Nancy Thompson, but with professional training), and murderers who aren’t invincible and actually make mistakes.  (more…)


Lovely Molly

{Cross-posted to Three Imaginary Girls

Opening with a “found footage” sequence (expected by Director Eduardo Sanchez, one-half of the writing and directing team that brought us The Blair Witch Project) packed with intense emotion, Lovely Molly then backtracks to start at the beginning.

Scraping together money to start their new life together, young married couple Molly and Tim Reynolds move back into her parent’s home: a spooky out-in-the-middle of nowhere 18th century house that Molly will be spending a LOT of time alone in while her husband works long hour trucking across the country.

It isn’t long before Molly starts being terrorized by sounds of footsteps, slamming doors, and an eerily haunting singsong voice that she believes is her dead father. As Molly slips deeper into depression and despair, the details of her tortured childhood are slowly revealed: horrible physical and sexual abuse at the hands of her father that led her to retreat into heavy drug use and destructive behavior, which she is repeating again with an even faster—and scarier—descent.

And this is where I disagree with most of the reviews I’ve read about this movie that say, “it’s not scary”, because it’s actually fucking terrifying. The thing is, the most frightening thing about Lovely Molly isn’t the horror aspect of the story—it’s the past demons that Molly is facing that make you feel true terror.  (more…)

Seriously. Now.

Cabin in the Woods !!! !! !!! ! ! Go see it. Now.


Bitter Feast

Bitter Feast caught my interest via its trailer, mostly because it stars indie actor Joshua Leonard and sensitive ponytail man from Singles (aka: James LeGros).

Due to a scathingly bad review by JT Franks (Leonard) on his blog, Gastropunks (ha.hahaha), Chef Peter Grey is booted from his restaurant and loses his TV show. It’s hinted that Grey has a lot of other mental issues – like being militantly sustainable, uh, if that’s an issue, I guess – but the gist is, he kidnaps the blogger and forces him to endure weeks of food-related torture, as well as a lot of merciless beatings. 

This film takes awhile to ramp up, but when it gets there, it’s worth it. There’s some incredible suspense going on, even when you *know* what’s going to happen. Not a ton of splatter, but some decent “aaaugggghh” moments, and most importantly, they didn’t fuck up the ending. It’s appropriately bleak.

All in all, this was much better than I was expecting. There is a ton of foreshadowing, but even though I saw some stuff coming, it still managed to surprise me. Recommended for indie horror fans – it’s available on DVD and streaming Netflix!

Funny Games 2.0

I just finished watching the 2007 remake of Funny Games, which is apparently a shot-for-shot faithful retelling of the original foreign film – which makes sense, because it’s done by the same director (wait, what?). It’s probably been about 10 years since I’ve seen the first one, and I remember liking it – but what I didn’t remember is that it at times breaks the fourth wall, and employs one really super dumb use of it.

SPOILERS COMING IN 3…2…1 (more…)

John Carpenter’s The Thing

With the remake prequel looming, you know I had to devote some time to a re-watch of John Carpenter’s The Thing.

Amazingly, despite the hair farm that Kurt Russel is cultivating (plus having to get over the fact that Wilfred Brimley looks downright spry and Keith David is young and virile), this 1982 film totally holds up.

The Thing itself is executed in grotesque, goop-covered F/X glory, lending a surreal touch to the already isolated Artic setting. And in addition to providing lots of splattery moments, this movie is also packed full of sneak-up-on-you jumpy scares, and thrilling reveals.

The Thing, you see, can be anybody, at any time. And there’s no way to know who it is. Alien had facehuggers that snuck in and impregnated people with babies. The Thing can slink around with one remaining tentacle and attack someone in secret, disguising themselves as a perfect replica.

Absolutely worth a watch — there’s not a boring moment on screen. And before you get all up in arms about the 2011 version, remember that this one was actually a remake too — of 1952’s The Thing From Another World.